Thursday, February 4, 2016

Best Friends Vs. Boy & Girl Friends


I just celebrated my 23rd birthday Sunday, January 31st. I still can’t believe that I’m 23, time really does fly by. I can still remember hanging out with my friends in high school. We would play basketball after school until late at night.

“Bro, I never seen anybody jump the way you do. No lie when I see you jump for a second I think you’re flying up there.”

I still remember talking about life with my close friends.

“Bro, you’re gonna make it with your poetry, I can see you writing a book and traveling the world.”

We imagined where life will take us in the future; wondering if all of us still will be hanging out together.

“Bro, my kids will be playing with your kids one day, we’ll being having BBQ’s in our backyards like your pops always do in the summer.”

None of us were never close to imagining that our lives would turn out the way it is now.

“I know we have different parents, I know we come from different parts of the world, but you’re my brother and we don’t need to be have the same blood to make that true.”

All that bonding – all that time spent together – and I never thought my close friends, I considered family at one point in my life, would lose touch with me over time…

Recently I’ve been hearing about people commonly expressing the amount of pain they endure during a breakup with a significant other. However, nobody ever talks about how much it hurts to lose a close friend. In my opinion, the pain of breaking up with a friend is greater than the pain of breaking up with a significant other. That friendship shaped your life in more ways than love and romance. Breaking a best friends bond shatters deeper than any boy/girlfriend relationship. Think about it, the person we marry ideally are our best friend’s… making losing your best friend more damaging than just losing a lover.

I’ve been in very few relationships; my longest relationship was probably 2 years. However, I’ve been friends with people since I was 4-years-old. A few years ago I broke a friendship with one of my friends that I knew since I was about 4-years-old and that hurt me more than losing any girlfriend I ever had. There are days when I want my best friend back more than anything, but there aren’t any days when I want one of my old girlfriends back.

He and I hung out in elementary school, we even went to the same middle school. When high school rolled around we went to different schools but still hangout almost every single day. I stuck by his side and he stuck by mine. One night we got into an argument and it wasn’t our first. However, by the end of it I had this feeling like it was our last, and it was.

Readers, hold your friends close and don’t take them for granted. When everything in your life goes wrong you can always turn to a good friend. That person that you consider the love of your life might not be there a few years down the road; but your good friend definitely will there by your side. Even if you haven’t spoken to your best friend in a couple of weeks they are still your best friend; time doesn’t diminish the friendship.

I say this because there are very few people I consider my best friend and I don’t talk to them every day; I don’t even see them once a week. However, in my heart there will always be a place for them. What happened between me and my closest friend was hard but I believe in time our paths will cross again. When they do I’ll make sure to be the bigger person and admit I was wrong because I’ll push aside my pride to keep a brother in my life. Remember that the next time you have a fight with your friend and you could potentially lose them. You never know because that could be your last fight… because I didn’t. 

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